In God We Trust

Serj Tankian - Lie Lie Lie

Trust is impossible to understand.

What is trust? Defined by the dictionary trust is “to have confidence or faith in”, a definition I, for once, am not appalled by. It does, however, present two very different versions of the word. Having confidence in something, including another being, is easily understood and accomplished. Generally, if something is consistent or proves itself in some way, it leads others to have confidence in it.

Having confidence in something, however, is much weaker than having faith in something. It requires belief, which assumes some degree of unknown regarding the object or person. In order to have faith in something, there has to be some degree of doubt, otherwise it isn’t faith. Let me pause for a moment to allow the person who convinced me this was true to realize they did.

So there are two versions of trust. The first, having confidence in something, can be found commonly. Ants, with no real measure of intelligence, work as a colony. They have complete and total confidence in the other ants to do their jobs and keep the colony alive. Wolves, which posses a high level of intelligence, have total confidence, or trust, in their pack leader.

For humans, however, the first definition does not justify the way we use the term. When you fully trust someone, you give them a blank check to make decisions that can deeply impact your immediate existence. In addition, you willingly believe everything that is told to you by that person without questioning sources or motive. From a survival standpoint, it seems irrational. Yet it is considered a necessity for intimate relationships (not just love, although this is a key component of any relationship involving love). When someone trusts another, and the word is used in that manner, they do not simply have confidence in them; they feel safe giving their very lives to them. You cannot give anything greater.

So where did it come from? Why is trust so much deeper for humans than it appears to be for our ecological companions?

It could be, as a vast majority of human behavior is, a self-fulfilling aspect of our existence. If we are able to trust another, and that trust is true, than we are able to reduce the number of decisions we need to deliberate carefully. Instead, we can allow the trusted other to deliberate half of those decisions, and we deliberate the other half. This leads to an overall better life, as each decision was thought out for longer and therefore has more beneficial consequences. This seems to make sense.

That is, assuming the other person didn’t exist before you trusted them. Since this is unreasonable, we have to assume that that person also has a number of decisions to make. Now, if you truly trust them, and they truly trust you, then they will also confer half of their decisions onto you. Now you have the same number of decisions. That was pointless.

Perhaps trust is a side-effect of our society, an evolution. Society is brutal, unforgiving, and stressful. Walking in this society alone is painful and absurdly difficult. To cope with their own monstrosity, humans developed a method in which to link themselves with one or more individuals to form a pack. This pack then exists together; delegating tasks and decisions as it best benefits the group.

Or maybe trust is just a delusion. We yearn to trust others so that we can believe that we don’t live in a world where self-survival is the only thing that matters. It would explain our stories of love and sacrifice. It would explain our desperate attempts at relationships and our disgust at failed marriages.

Going further, what if trust is malicious? We seek to take the burden of the world off ourselves and dump it onto another so that we can escape our reality, knowing that person will be unable to handle both lives. Yet, when someone trusts us to make their decisions, we insist on input from them. We refuse to take the matter into our own hands for fear that it will lead to further burden from that person.

Despite its complexity, I trust someone will have an answer someday. See what I did there?