Love Sucks

Beck – Cellphone’s Dead

Love sucks. I can prove it to you, too.

It’s temporary. How many times have you said you’ve loved someone? How many times have you loved someone without saying it? How many times have you been married? Why didn’t the first one last? Why don’t you still love the first person you ever loved? Because love gets bored. It jumps out of the bush, punches you in the face and runs away when it’s not funny anymore.

Like a spoiled third grader, it throws a tantrum and storms out when confronted with the smallest incident. Nothing is immune. That cute quirk is just not cute anymore. They don’t actually like that dress. They always had a little crush on your roommate. They like where they live now. They don’t understand why you have to keep that in the house. They insist they are doing it for you. They can’t keep doing it. Long distance doesn’t work, so you stay close to each other. If you stay close to each other, you have to give up something. If you give enough up for a relationship, the relationship doesn’t work. Joseph Heller would be proud.

It’s frustrating. If you fall in love with someone, you’ve no doubt shelved something to make room for them. Didn’t you want to hike the Appalachian Trail? Not if she doesn’t. Didn’t you want to paint that? Not if he won’t let you keep it in the house. Your real urges and desires take a back seat while you try to satisfy the unquenchable thirst for your significant other. Love burns like the sun. You know what a burning sun makes? Deserts.

What if they don’t notice you? What if this person love has thrust into your life doesn’t have the same interest in you? Well, now you’ve put your self-fulfilling excursions or manifestation of expressions on hold so you can wander love’s desert looking for them. Only you can’t find them, because they aren’t there. The only way out is to die of thirst and move on.

Or maybe you have something. Maybe you found someone in that desert. Now you both frolic happily around the burning sands trying desperately not to trip other by taking off your shoes, burning your feet. Now you’re limping, holding on to them, only able to keep pace because they wait for you. Then they stop waiting for you, because someone else is frolicking up ahead. You face plant in the sand, unable to move. You gave up everything for them and they threw you to the ground while they go off and pursue some oasis in the distance. Not for you. You’re on the ground wishing you never met them, missing all the others stepping over you. You’ve managed to debilitate yourself during the relationship by giving so much, only to have your self-esteem and mental health mutilated by something you saw coming.

So what do you do? You pull yourself out of the sand, stand back up and find yourself walking the path of your life again. Only everything is totally different now. Everything has moved. The road less traveled is an Interstate Freeway, and you don’t have a car. Ok, go buy a car. Got the car, need to get some gas. Hey, who is that waiting in line with you? HOW DID I GET IN THIS DESERT AGAIN?!